Errotic Popsicles
by MadDub
Summary: John eats a red Popsicle. Karkat is aroused by this. Slash.


**So this is really short, really dumb, but hey, plenty fluffy. Or maybe not really all that fluffy. I dunno. **

**Written for a good friend of mine who asked for basically my summary put into a fic. And yes, I do realize I have four incomplete works sitting in my account right now that I _should _be working on. I have not grown bored or given up on them; I just have the fleeting attention span of a grasshopper or a gnat.**

**Anyway, to the story!**

* * *

><p>The Land of Frost and Frogs swirled underneath John in a kaleidoscope of color, ironically hot and green for a planet that had once been cursed with ice and snow.<p>

After the game had ended, most of Jade's still-frozen zones had melted and turned all steamy and humid, which was kind of nice because it meant it was no longer agonizing to hang out with Jade on her planet, but bad because all of the flooding not only created swamps and overflowing lakes and ponds, but because all of the animals and wildlife that survived were reproducing like _crazy_! Frogs and bugs and weird little piranha things with feet scrambled and infested everything here! Jade had begged everyone to come down and help her try to make little homes for all the new life forms and help distribute food and build shelter, and John was never one to stay behind while a friend was in need, however, it was just so _hot _here. Even the air currents felt uncomfortably thick with heat, providing more of a heater-like effect than a cooling-off sort.

Some of the others, of course, complained loudly, so Jade promised to supply frozen treats if they would just _give her _a minute.

John couldn't say he wasn't excited. It had been so long since he'd had any ice cream or snow cones or _anything _except for Fruit Gushers, and a part of him was really curious to see the trolls' reactions to the colder foods. Especially Karkat's. Gog, that guy was hilarious.

John set back down outside of Jade's like tower, sweat sticking his godtier clothes to his body and turning his skin flushed.

The others weren't faring much better. Dave was in the middle of trying to get his godtier clothes off, but had somehow tangled himself up in his cape and shirt; Rose was fanning herself with a wad of papers; Terezi had her head stuck in the pond; Gamzee's shirt was in shreds beside him, his thick hair matted with sweat, honking like a sad psycho clown; Kanaya was sitting a few feet from Rose, panting and swiping at her forehead; Feferi was in the pond, splashing Terezi and giggling; Jake had his shirt tied around his head, tanned torso glistening with sweat; Jane and Roxy had somehow dug up some water guns and were spraying each other, Dirk (who looked very unhappy to have his hair wet), and Jake, who yelped; and Karkat was laying on his back, staring up at the clouds floating lazily above them, sweater holding large sweat stains up the sides. Eww.

Jade took the moment to shuffle out of the tower entryway with a large crate, her voluminous hair tied up in a ponytail and her godtier replaced with a tanktop and shorts to match Jake.

"I have Popsicles!" Jade announced in a cheery voice, taking the box over and sitting it on a picnic table the Striders had alchemized for "festive" purposes. "Come and get 'em!"

Kanaya followed Rose over to the box, looking curious; Terezi, Feferi, Jane, Jake, and Roxy didn't seem to hear her, and continued on with their shenanigans; Dirk and Dave wondered over silently, Gamzee honking as he trailed after them, but John walked over to poke the unmoving Karkat with the toe of his shoe, whispering, "Karkat? Are you still alive?"

A single red eye opened to glare up at him, sweat beading on the troll's face and running back into his messy hair. "Fuck you, Egbert. Fuck you and fuck your ectobiological sibling who insisted for whatever inane reason that her pack of ribbitbeasts needed to be treated like people, which, by the way, they are _not_."

John giggled, prodding at Karkat's ribs again, Karkat swiped at his shoe, slicing a cut into the side of his yellow sneaker. Wow, his claws were sharp! "Come on, Kitkat! Let's get some Popsicles!"

"I don't know what the hell that is, and with you if I don't know whatever the primate tit it is beforehand, it's nothing good." Karkat shot him a pointed one-eyed glare at this.

John pouted, but he knew there was no point arguing with Karkat when the troll got into one of these moods. "Well, if you say so. _I'm _going to go get something to eat, but you can just sit here."

"Thank gog," Karkat exclaimed as he walked away, but John didn't take offense. Karcrab was nicknamed as such for a reason.

"John!" Jade called happily, digging through the box before handing him a red Popsicle sealed in plastic. The ice was so cold that the water in the air froze as it touched the plastic, creating a wet, fog-like cover over the wrapper. "Here you go!"

"Thanks!" John replied gratefully, taking it from her.

The chill of the Popsicle bit into his skin when he wrapped his hand around it, peeling back the plastic and giving the ice a long, reverent lick. Ah man, that was _so _good. Maybe it was just the heat getting to him, but this right here was _perfect_.

Someone close by choked, and alarmed and ready to find a troll in a hilarious situation, he turned with the Popsicle on his lips, but instead of hilarity, it was just Karkat, red in the face and with his head turned away. Weird. Wonder what got into him.

Shrugging to himself, John focused back on his Popsicle so he could shove the top between his lips. An icy chill coupled with an explosion of artificial cherry flavoring burst through his mouth, invoking a slightly inappropriate moan. Gog, he missed eating these. Where had his childhood gone? Why did he ever stop treating himself to flavored ice?

Unfortunately, the heat of his open mouth and the high temperature of LOFAF were already melting the cold goodness, melting it and causing thin droplets of red to lazily roll down the frozen cylindrical shape of it. John happily chased those drops with his tongue, wanting the least amount of sticky syrup-juice on his hands as absolutely possible. However, as John was busying himself with just that, someone whimpered loudly.

He turned and found himself locking eyes with a blushing Karkat, who looked away from him again as if embarrassed.

John considered his Popsicle, then Karkat's expression, blue eyes flitting between the two. He was a pretty oblivious person, he could admit that, however it kind of seemed like . . . Like Karkat was aroused. By John. John eating red ice.

He didn't consider himself a sadist, but he knew he had to test this out. He tried to turn away from Karkat as obviously as he could, watching his friend out of the corner of his eye as he pretended to go back to his food. Karkat glanced back over at him after a few seconds, cheeks still pleasantly pink, eyes hooded, face sweaty. Feeling a bit awkward but determined not to show it, John gave the Popsicle a good lick.

No reaction, not even just looking away.

Well, he guessed he'd have to take it up a notch. John slipped the tip between and slurped, and while sorely tempted to moan dirtily just to get to Karkat, he was too embarrassed to go _that _far.

Either way, it had the desired—or at least suspected—effect. Karkat's Adam's apple bobbed as he gulped; face going a tinge redder, eyes flashing.

Oh gog. What even _was _that look and how could John get more of it?

Eyeing Karkat, he continued sensually pulling the Popsicle from his mouth with a nice little suction sound that took another whine from Karkat. Hehe. That was pretty cool, actually. John felt kind of stupid trying to lick and suck ice seductively, but the noises Karkat made had him wondering if _maybe, _just maybe, he was actually a little bit sexy.

However, then Karkat stood up abruptly, frowning and sweaty and flushed. Was he getting up to leave? John didn't scare him away, did he?

But instead of leaving, Katkat sauntered forward, stance predatory, merciless, and John wondered if maybe he was planning to kill the Heir instead. Oh shoot. What if John had offended him in some way? Had he accidentally violated a troll culture-thing? Should he run?

He got one step backward before Karkat was in front of him, one clawed hand fisting in the collar of John's godtier before turning on his heel and dragging the windy boy away.

"Karkat, what—?"

"Shut up." John was slammed into the wall of the tower, out of sight of the others in the cooler shade of Jade's home, Karkat's hands braced on either side of his head. The troll's eyes were smoldering, black lips curled to show a hint of fangs. "I cannot get over how ridiculous you are, Egbert. You have to be the stupidest, weakest, most worthless excuse of a person I have or will ever meet, and yet despite that and your adamant declarations of not liking boys, you pull shit like _this._"

Gray hands slammed the walls beside John's ears. Karkat's head leaned in close, the heat of the troll engulfing and suffocating John. It was too hot outside for them to be so close, but the human couldn't bring himself to push the other boy away. Instead, he brought his Popsicle—clutched tightly in one hand, sticky syrup covering his fingers—and waggled his eyebrows.

"Oh, you mean _this_?" And then he licked the ice again, one long, delicious lick with his eyes locked on Karkat's.

"Oh fuck me." John didn't really understand what that was supposed to mean, but when Karkat's lips darted forward to seal against his, he decided he didn't care, either.

His hands came up reflexively, one hand dropping his Popsicle so both hands were free to curl into the troll's gross hair, brushing the base of his horns. Karkat shuddered against him, pressing his body hard to John's and effectively pinning the human between the wall and Karkat. Teeth gently scraped over soft lips, and with an involuntary groan, John parted for him, reveling in the rough, wet tongue that immediately invaded and conquered his mouth.

Kissing Karkat was kind of like kissing a really talented shark with a tongue. It was rough; sharp teeth biting and nipping and teasing, tongue dominating and hungry, lips frantic and warm and leathery. When they finally paused for air, Karkat was instantly nosing down his jaw to put his shark-mouth at the column of John's throat, which was as alarming as it was arousing.

He made a strange noise in the back of his throat and tilted his head back, giving Karkat more access. The troll chirped in delight and quickly sank his pointed teeth into John hard enough for the boy to cry out and tug harshly at the other's hair. Karkat didn't seem to mind; in fact, John could have sworn he felt the Cancer smirking into the skin of his neck.

"_Karkat," _John hissed, needy and overheated and really, _really _worried about getting caught doing something not so appropriate.

Karkat responded by sucking a mark into the side of his neck, and just like that John's brain was much more preoccupied with other things. Oh, fuck it. He could go for some nicely inappropriate events about now if the tightness in his trousers were anything to go by.

"I swear, Karkat, if you don't fuck me _right now_—"

"Shut up. I'm getting to it."


End file.
